By Sarah Gleeson | @survivor_unleashed

We're taught early in life to measure our lives by what we do, how much we accomplish, how much we give, or how perfectly we perform. But if you've ever felt like you're "not enough," no matter how much you try, it is essential to remember that many women out there have the same feelings and thoughts as you do.

For trauma survivors, perfectionism and people-pleasing often become survival tools. Tools that keep us feeling safe, keep the peace, or help us to feel seen. But, as we heal, those same tools can sometimes hold us back from what we want most.

Reclaiming self-worth isn't about doing more; it's about remembering who you are beneath the proving and performing.

Here are 3 Mindset Shifts that can help you build self-worth from the inside out.

From earning worth to owning it

When you've lived through pain and/or rejection, it's easy to believe you have to earn love, respect or rest. You start measuring your value by productivity, external validation, and other people's approval.

But here's the truth: self-worth is not a currency.
You don't have to do anything different to deserve peace, joy and belonging.

The work is unlearning the lie that you must hustle for your worth.

“Owning your worth is your first act of rebellion against every belief that told you otherwise.”
- Sarah Gleeson

Try this:
Every morning, before you reach for the phone, place your hand over your heart and say,
"I was born worthy. I don't have to prove it today."
Repeat this until it feels less like a stretch and more like a truth, because it is.

From Self-Criticism to Self-Compassion

Our inner dialogue can be harsher than anything we'd ever say to someone we love. Survivors often internalize voices from the past. critical parents, dismissive partners, toxic workplaces, and unknowingly make them their own.

Self-Compassion isn't about lowering your standards. It's about creating an inner environment that's safe enough for growth.

Think of it this way, a seed doesn't bloom because you yell at it to hurry up. It blooms because you give it sunlight, space and nourishment.
You need the same.

Try this:
The next time you catch your inner critic saying,
"I should be further along", pause and ask yourself, "What would I say to a dear friend who felt this way?"
Then say that to yourself.

Healing happens in the soil of gentleness, not judgement.

From Comparison to Connection

Comparrison is the theif of self-worth, yet it's one of the most common traps in the healing journey.
We scroll through highlight reels, measuring our behind-the-scenes against someone else's edited moment.

But the goal shouldn't be to be like someone else. The goal is to be more fully yourself.
True confidence comes from connection, not competition.

When you see another woman shining, let her success remind you of what's possible, not what's missing.

"There's no scarcity in purpose, only in perspective."
- Sarah Gleeson

Try this:
When comparison creeps in, whisper to yourself: "Her light doesn't dim mine. We rise together."
Then redirect your focus to one thing that you're proud of in this moment.

The more you celebrate others without losing yourself, the stronger your own self-worth becomes.

The Daily Practice of Remembering Who You Are

Self-worth isn't built overnight, it's a daily practice of remembering who you are when the noise fades and the masks fall away.

It's not found in validation or perfection.
It's found in presence, truth, and self-honoring choices.

Every time your choose compassion over criticism, rest over rushing, or truth over performance, you relclaim another piece of yourself.

You are worthy.
You are enough.
And the world is better because you're in it.